14 4 2008

dear diary
Our family astrologer says i'll study more. well so unlikely it may seem but nobody has ever questioned him or watever he says gets true, but we'll see
Just 19 working days left and 40 as such and the life of hosteler at nitj seems to be coming to an end.who knows where will i be when i study more and if i study more!!
Its been fun being in a hostel with couple of friends around.Sitting in the room all by myself. those latenight chats when youve got something imp to do about an entirely irrelevant topic . The feeling of fire which makes you a rocket.Well im having a hard time believing we are not going to be here for more time.
I just returned from a trip to jwalaji and chintapoorni , had to stay there in night as no bus after 6. so here we were 3 guys to a pilgrimage . one of us couldnt stop swearing as it had become hi s habit.The trip went fine except the night when i had not taken the blanket due to hygiene reasons .i always fear that i'll catch this of that communicable disease if i take a blanket from a room like that. so we talked a little and slept .Shot lots of pics and then we came back.
im not a groupism kind of person like to keep it small. mayebe i fear that will not get lot of people who think im a nice guy and one reason of that is, im too blunt to be true. i like to keep things straight and and simple, no complications , no lies , preferably just pure truth.I can be unreasonable sometimes when im not in a good mood , which is when someone tries to take advantage to me , which a lot of people do. They do not consider me consider me as another human , hust someone who can be made to work with little please and all. I know when im playing bad and i hope people should understand too, but many dont and thats whey i get angry. i donno when people dont take such hints and get out.
Im always so manipulatable when im in good mood. Forrest gump says stupid is what stupid does . well i also sometimes dont think before speaking but im trying to to reduce it but pls god help me.Sometimes goodness is stupidity ,well not sometimes almost 90% times goodness is taken as stupidity. People dont expect you to do good as they didnt behave good, but when they see me they think im stupid to help them unconditionally when they didnt at their chance. U know why i help unconditionally because i expect half heartedly to be not played with after all im selfish too . everbody does this-that for some reason and my reason for writing is simple , somebody notice me and understand me, which i know is not going to happen

god bless me god bless you and god bless us all

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